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What Pooh Might Have Said To Dante And Other Futile Speculations

What Pooh Might Have Said to Dante and Other Futile Speculations - Manny Rayner It’s here! : a paperback collection of the greatest Manny Rayner reviews! How do I review a book full of reviews I already “Liked”? I pretty much have to give it five stars, right? Well, I do enjoy these reviews a lot, so I hope you will too. This book would make a great present for somebody who’s never heard of GoodReads before, like maybe a caveman recently unfrozen from an ancient glacier, or a tribesperson you met on your last visit to the darkest corners of the Amazon basin. If you do give this book as a present, please point out to the lucky recipient the Acknowledgments page, which prominently features a BirdBrian as one of the forces of nature which helped Manny assemble this ambitious project. That's important. One thing occurred to me as I read this, and that was: if the internet should ever be destroyed, the only evidence future archaeologists will have that GoodReads ever existed will be Manny’s reviews. Think about that for a second. I’m a huge Manny fan, but it wouldn’t quite be a complete picture of GoodReads, would it? I’d much rather think of a future where the GoodReads has assumed its rightful position as the dominant cultural influence.==============================================From: Professor Smetchie del MalDept of GoodReadsology, Paul Bryant CollegeElizabethtown, IanGraycelandCanad-Eh!To:Professor Paquita Sanchez DeNutheThe Ginnie Jones Emeritus Chair of GoodReads Historiography, Brissette University Marielpolis, Ceridwenistan Mon-day, 32 Gregtober 346, Californium AgeDear Paquita,Well-wishes, Esteemed GoodReader! I recently acquired an ancient text which carbon dating places somewhere between the GR Bronze Age, before the very First Zombie Apocalypse, or as late as the Iridium Age, after the Kowalski Revolution. I am sending it to you for authentication, as I recall your doctoral thesis was on the Manny Rayner Phenomenon, and the document- a paperbook- claims Rayner as its author! Obviously if it is real, it should establish once and for all that Rayner really existed, and was not merely a sockpuppet of Notgettingenough.About the book itself: it is a compilation of reviews- many of them never seen before, and not preserved on modern GoodReads with the rest of extant human knowledge. I truly hope this is not a hoax, as it references a broad array of peri-Apocalyptic writings, including: Stuff White People Like, Infinite Jest, and something called The Divine Comedy. Please take a look and tell me what you think. Several reviews mention the game "chess", but from the context seem to suggest it was played by human beings, rather than computers. Both Twilight and The Bible are mentioned, as well as a third religious book, Devil of the Highlands- presumably an apocryphal writing about Satan‘s activities on Earth. Please forward the review to your colleagues in the World Religions Dept for further study. Perhaps current technologies can Alfonso-fy it, in some way. I am enclosing a few other questions here for your consideration, which I look forward to discussing with you at length, when we meet in person:1) Is Rayner’s tone in his Overqualified review serious? Is he telling The Hardcore Truth when he presents the review as an application for a position at GoodReads? 2) In his Crowds and Power review, Rayner touches on the subject of politics in the pre-Apocalypse. Could Crowds and Power be a key to explaining how dictators like Hitler, Rockefeller or the anti-Caris came to power in that era?3) If this truly is a work by Rayner, why are no Celebrity Deathmatches included? Do you think this work could have been written before the advent of televised Celebrity Deathmatches or the establishment of GoodReads Reviewer HungerGames?4) There is a conspicuous lack of images in these reviews. In a compilation of 84 titles, not a single picture is shown! Does this argue against the authenticity of the document, or -which is even more intriguing- could this book have been published during the brief rule of Pope BirdBrian VI, who explicitly proscribed LOLCATS and other non-pornographic images by edict, before he was Rivka‘d by the masses?5) Does this finding of GoodReads reviews printed on paper prove the existence of a "PrinterNet" -an early proto-internet in which words appeared on paper rather than electronic screens?6) Is the paucity of incest or cannibalism in these reviews evidence against their authenticity?I needn’t emphasize the care that should be taken with this old document. Surely, if it is real it should be worth many grams of gold, if not priceless. Otis-be-Praised,Smetchie