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Flash & Green Lantern: The Brave and the Bold

The Flash/Green Lantern: The Brave and the Bold - Mark Waid, Tom Peyer, Barry Kitson, Tom Grindberg Good Lord, the writing for these just keeps getting worse and worse. Time was, Flash and Green Lantern (GL) were both interesting characters in their own right. They each starred in their own comic franchises for decades. Those days are apparently gone. Their individual popularity has waned to the point they've had to be combined into a crimefighting partnership. Fine. Crossovers can be interesting sometimes... but not here. I won't go through every embarrassing story, but let's take a look at two:A WORLD OF HURTThis is probably the worst story in this issue. If I were out fighting crime with a superpower-enhanced buddy, and we were both suddenly visited by time-traveling versions of ourselves, that would be so amazing I would probably have to be checked into a sanitarium to recover my blown mind. The artless writers at DC Comics, however, manage to make it seem like the lamest-ass thing that has ever happened. Here's how do they do it: 1) No exposition: On meeting their time-traveling doubles, Flash and GL don't ask why or how they are being visited. And the travelers don't offer! WTF? 2) Move the plot forward with randomness: What's the first thing the time-traveling Flash and GL want to do when they show up? Go camping, of course. Is that really worth bending the laws of time and space for? Maybe nobody in the future wants to go on a camping trip with them. 3) Just when you thought it couldn't get lamer... What happens on the camping trip? Three pages of characters using their superpowers to assemble a tent, that's what. 4) Big finale with a ridiculous, nonsensical threat: The super campers are attacked by beetles. (no, I'm not making this up) But not just any ordinary beetles. These ones can assemble themselves to form one giant beetle. Since the smaller beetles couldn't kill the superheros, I was not surprised that the giant one couldn't either.5) Half-hearted wrap-up: Present-day Flash/Green Lantern (PDFGL):OMG!! Where did those beetles come from? Why were they trying to kill us? What did they want?Time-traveling Flash/Green Lantern (TTFGL): We knew they would be here, and we intentionally subjected you to this trial, because we knew it would make you stronger. You'll need to be stronger in the future.PDFGL: Oh, uh thanks? Can you tell us what threat is coming, that we'll need to be strong for?TTFGL: Sorry- that would be against the rules. We have to go now. Bye!PDFGL: Thanks for nothing, assholes.HOW MANY TIMES CAN A MAN TURN HIS HEAD?This story almost seems like an admission by the writers of how badly they've handled things. Since the Flash/Green Lantern up to this point have been such a disappointment, Green Arrow is called on to join them, and hopefully spice things up. A convoluted story follows, about a corrupt mayor using a private police force to run his secret crime ring. That could actually be interesting, if it had been developed. That would require some thinking, and reflection on the responsibilities of elected officials, and the proper role of police in a democracy. No luck. The plot degerates into a lot of brute-force superhero antics. Suddenly, in the middle of the action, Green Arrow just ditches Flash and GL! He's like "I think you two can handle this", and then he rides off with his girlfriend, Black Canary, on her motorcycle! Well, to be fair, who would you rather hang out with?THIS...OR THIS?It's like the Green Arrow is flipping off Flash/Green Lantern. He disappears into the sunset (literally), while they stand there like chumps.. like so many readers who realize at this point they've spent the last hour plodding through an incredibly dumbass comic instead of going out and trying to meet a woman. On one hand, it's probably something a lot of comic readers could stand to hear. On the other hand, it's a big "fuck you" from DC Comics. Come to think of it: this whole issue is.